The Unbearable Lateness of Being

It’s 8:24 a.m. and the harsh realization that I have been stood up is beginning to set in. Visions of my breakfast date lying bruised, bloodied, and unconscious in the middle of a crosswalk somewhere flash through my mind. I quickly dismiss these macabre images because I know she has not been run over by an out-of-towner unfamiliar with our pedestrian laws. I know that she, like the others, has forgotten our appointment.

This is neither the first time this sort of thing has happened, nor is it the last. I suspect I would need all ten fingers and nearly all ten toes to count the number of times I have been left waiting by someone who has either forgotten me, or has been so late in arriving that I give up and leave. I take the slightest comfort in knowing that I am not the only victim of these time thieves. This is nearly a bi-monthly occurrence for some of my colleagues.

The Passage of Time by ToniVC used under Creative Commons License

I do not dwell on these disappointments, but as I think back over the last 4.5 years I cannot help but remember some particularly memorable missed connections, spread evenly among faculty and students, with the occasional dash of administrator. I will refrain from giving specific examples, even with the names omitted; we are a small community and it is not my intention to make particular individuals feel bad. Instead, it is my aim, for lack of a better cliche, to raise awareness about this growing problem.

I like to think human kind is inherently good (You hear that? Hobbes just rolled over in his grave). I do not think anyone has maliciously stood me up, or arrived 20-30 minutes late out of spite. In fact, I usually receive a phone call or email afterward with profuse apologies peppered with promises of free meals, first-borns, and/or chocolate. Rather, I think the problem lies in our tendency to stuff every nook and cranny of our days with a myriad of obligations and commitments. We juggle too many balls; we are bound to drop (or forget) one of them.

This is not an earth-shattering observation, I know. Although I will refrain from lecturing on how the collapse of society is imminent unless we stop overbooking ourselves, I will offer three ridiculously easy steps so you won’t keep anyone waiting:

• Class @ 8 a.m. Thesis Advisor Meeting @ 10:30. Lunch in Ross @ 12. Discussion Section @ 1:15. Hillel Meeting @ 6. A cappella rehearsal @ 6:30. Physics Exam @ 7. Poetry Slam/Mac ‘n Cheese in the Gamut Room @ 10. You get the picture . . . enter all of your appointments on a pocket calendar, daybook, note pad, 100% post-consumer waste napkin, iPod, or whatever-works-best-for-you, so you don’t miss a thing.

• Don’t become so engrossed in your chemistry problem set or history paper that you forget the appointment you so dutifully wrote on your calendar.  Set a cell phone alarm for 5-10 minutes before you need to leave for an appointment.

• Remember you value your time as much as others value their time.